Cliche lines in Reading the Books fics

[lucyolsen]

I thought it would interesting to call out the cliche lines that seem to end up in many of the fics we read. Regardless of who says them, they almost always seem to get said.

So, I nominate, "That better not be you." said right after it says that Dudley hates exercise except for punching people.

[mountaingirl777]

Molly also says that a lot when it says one of the kids is doing something but doesn't give then name(s), usually she looks at Fred and George.

[Dimcairien]

Well, one that nearly always pops up when there are future characters is "You'll see." I've used that one a lot, but it is necessary at points.

[Serena R. Snape]

I think I used that too.

And I really like cliches of characters saying something that the book characters say. I'm especially practicing this with Sirius.

[lucyolsen]

I think some of those cliches are amusing, but I was more wanting to call out the ones that make it seem like we've read this story before. So many of these stories are so similar to each other that it makes it all blur together.

[mountaingirl777]

yeah, I can't remember where it was, but I started to write something and I was like "Wait.....am I copying from something I read?", I then erased it and typed something else up.

[kumainpink]

Minerva saying "I told you they were the worst sort!" or something along those lines to Dumbledore, when Harry's cupboard is mentioned.

[Serena R. Snape]

Hmm... I can't remember. Although to be honest, I haven't been reading Reading the Books so much lately.

Though I am trying to make my series have a bit different reactions than the stories I read. For example, I didn't make people yell at Snape too much about how he treated Harry in the first Potions class. Don't know if that was okay though.

[tabethac]

I have to say, the one line I see a lot is "that isn't a word!" when Dursleyish is mentioned in the first chapter of Sorcerer's Stone.

[isk2837]

One line I've seen a few times is in the first chapter of PS, when this line is read - "Albus Dumbledore didn't seem to realize that he had just arrived in a street where everything from his name to his boots was unwelcome.", Dumbledore will say something like "I did know, I just didn't care." if he's there. Or someone who knows Dumbledore will say something like "He probably did know and just didn't care."

I've also seen more than one fic where it's debated whether Harry flew or apparated in the second chapter of PS where he ends up on the roof of the school.

[eskimoRock]

Where Fred and George start talking about the boring tie line! Its a bit overused, to be honest.

[Animikokala]

Jun 8, 2012 0:20:45 GMT -5 kumainpink said:

Minerva saying "I told you they were the worst sort!" or something along those lines to Dumbledore, when Harry's cupboard is mentioned.

To be fair, she did tell him that, so I'd like to think it would be in character for her to remind him of that fact. It's not restricted to "Reading the Books" fics either; I've seen tons of fics where Harry's been mistreated by the Dursleys and the Minerva "I told you so" statement pops out.

[isk2837]

Speaking of Fred and George and the first chapter of PS, another line I've seen more than once from them is "You're welcome" in response to the line "Mr and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much."

[eskimoRock]

Fred and George as a whole have cliched lines in the first chapter. When we first hear about the cat, they always seem to shout "MINNIE!"

Another one I just thought of, some people seem to think that the wizard who hugs Vernon in the first chapter is Flitwick. There are plenty of short wizards, why must it be him?

[isk2837]

It's not the only time that unnamed characters in PS are suggested to be named characters because of a single common feature. There are fics that suggest that the newsreader in the first chapter of PS is Ted Tonks just because he's mentioned to be called Ted, or that the woman complaining about the price of dragon livers in the chapter where Harry goes to Diagon Alley is Molly Weasley because she's described as plump (and possibly because she's complaining about increased prices as well, given that the Weasleys are well known to be poor). Personally I think it started as an attempt by someone to make their fic more original, and then became cliched like so many other things.

Some other cliches I've remembered - people claiming that Harry gets his curiosity from James and/or Lily, people (usually Ron or Hermione) commenting on Harry's plans tending to fail after this part of The Letters From No-One - "Someone knew he had moved out of his cupboard and they seemed to know he hadn't received his first letter. Surely that meant they'd try again? And this time he'd make sure they didn't fail. He had a plan" Personally I've never got that - if Ron and Hermione really have that little faith in Harry's planning ability, then why would they continue to follow his lead on anything?

[lucyolsen]

Well, for all that we have ended up reading the same story over and over again, there are some unique diamonds. Too bad they were deleted.

As for the next cliche, Professor Burbage (or whoever), writes down muggle things so they can be explained later. She keeps writing those stupid notes. For once, I would like to actually see the Q&A session that results from this!


Of course, cliches are not just in the read the books fics. Some of the biggest and well known cliches are Remus's obsession with chocolate, and Fred and George calling each other Gred and Forge all the time.

Really, the last one actually bugs me. The only reason they called each other that at all was because they were joking (as they often do) about their mother thinking that they don't know their own names (and it was once!)

[mountaingirl777]

One cliche that I've seen is the twins writing down jokes/pranks to use on the Durselys after hearing what they had done to Harry, then later on Sirius goes and helps them.

[Silvertongue]

Jun 8, 2012 10:50:07 GMT -5 lucyolsen said:

As for the next cliche, Professor Burbage (or whoever), writes down muggle things so they can be explained later. She keeps writing those stupid notes. For once, I would like to actually see the Q&A session that results from this!

I want someone to do that too!!! It really bugs me.

How Hermione is always the one to explain the muggle things, especially the drills.

"Something that makes holes to build things."

That is a terrible explanation for someone who isn't muggle! It would make no sense!

[isk2837]

When Snape confiscates a book from Harry in PS, it's often followed by someone revealing that Snape actually did make the rule up.

People who are reading saying the same things as people in the books - e.g. Hermione (the one reading) will say something, and then McGonagall (in the book) will say the same thing, leading to teasing about how the two characters think the same way.

Ron defending his asking Harry about what happened the night his parents died by reasoning that Molly only forbade Fred from asking about it - she didn't say anything directly to Ron so he's fine.

[lucyolsen]

That reminds me, that in The Potions Master, "why aren't you writing this down" is usually followed by "Because you didn't tell them to!"

Really, glare all you want at the guy for other things, but a teacher has to inform students that they should be taking notes?

[ginnyrules27]

It's not really a line but it is really cliche. When people make the Slytherins (ie Malfoy and Pansy) actually like Harry after reading the first chapter of the first book. Really now?

[sn0rkack]

That awkward moment when Harry starts calling Snape "Severus"

[Silvertongue]

"Don't look at me! I haven't done it yet!" and any other variation of this phrase.

Draco being ashamed of the way he handled Madame Malkins and the train ride.

[lucyolsen]

The marauders (or anyone else) taught Peeves the "Got your conk" bit, or the swear words he was writing on the blackboard. I am fairly certain that he's ancient, and no one in recent memory taught him these things.

[Silvertongue]

The marauders (or anyone else) taught Peeves the "Got your conk" bit, or the swear words he was writing on the blackboard. I am fairly certain that he's ancient, and no one in recent memory taught him these things.

Them or Lily, though I've seen Snape and Mcgonagall. And Salazar and Godric too.

[lucyolsen]

Well, at least if it was Salazar or Godric, that would be close to when Peeves was young, and so that's actually believable. But I refuse to think that he went thousands of years without coming up with it for himself, only to be taught be a teenager

[sherza]

Well, if you're going to claim someone taught it to him ... WHEN did 'conk' commonly mean 'nose'? I don't much mind the Marauders having taught him that, because grabbing someone by the nose and saying 'got your conk' HAS to be relatively a new thing. It's also childish and stupid and *right* up the very-young-Marauders' alley. Now, did they sit down and instruct Peeves? Nah. But he probably saw them doing it and copied them.

As for cliche' moments ... Hermione freaking the heck out when she realizes that Snape is going to find out who set him on fire/stole the potions ingredients.

The Trio in general freaking out over people finding out what they've done that no one knows about yet.

Some kid asking if points/punishments can be handed out for past/future actions.

Teachers giving/taking points and detentions for past/future actions ... or Dumbledore proclaiming such cannot be done (and in the case of the latter, Snape getting ultra-pissed about no punishments when something happens that he doesn't like)

Snape being disappointed in Draco's actions, and/or thinking that wasn't how Draco presented events to him when Draco told him about things.

[Dimcairien]

Salazar and Godric is the most believable I think, especially as I think Peeves has been around for as long as Hogwarts has been around.

[lucyolsen]

So what if he hasn't been saying "conk" since the age of the founders? Peeves is perfectly capable of adapting his language for the times.

And obviously, the twins and the Marauders are the only pranksters that have every come through this school.

[sherza]

Really? You can see Godric Gryffindor and (especially!) Salazar Slytherin teaching Peeves the Poltergeist to grab people's noses and say 'got your conk'? Really?

And I didn't say it HAD to be the Marauders, just that it didn't bother me, because that's something I could see them doing, and Peeves observing and copying it. I can also see the Prewitt twins doing it. (they were a few years ahead of the Marauders).

I can even see any of the current teachers doing it when they were kids, Flitwick especially, since he seems to be a very jolly soul. But any of the Founders? Not so much. It's a very juvenile, childish thing, and I just can't see ANY adult doing it or teaching it to a poltergeist. Godric and Salazar could have done it as kids, sure, but they were adults when they started building Hogwarts, so they're out of the running for having taught it to Peeves, unless the bugger was originally from one of their homes and got transplanted or something.