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Post by teehee100 on Mar 15, 2013 9:54:59 GMT -5
So what do you guys think she was going to say to Harry in DH?
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Post by eskimoRock on Mar 15, 2013 12:26:03 GMT -5
I always really wanted her to apologise.
I don't think she's all bad deep down, but I can't imagine how it must feel to be her. You fall out with your sister because you're so jealous, vow not to see her again basically, and then you find out she's dead and you have to raise this kid with her eyes, like a constant reminder of what you did wrong. I think that would make anybody bitter. Also how basically, if she was nice to Harry when Vernon hated him so much she could have lost her husband, and then that would have hurt her son, and her son is the most important thing in her life.
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Post by ayrine_sun on Sept 18, 2013 14:28:25 GMT -5
I believe Petunia had a inferiority complex, steamed probably by the fact her parents were too busy trying to make Lily feel as normal as possible and that they were proud of her, while I think they neglected to say the same to Petunia. I am sure they didn't mean anything bad, but hearing everyday her parents say "Lily is so special, we are so proud of her", it must have been hard on a kid, even more after being rejected from Hogwarts.
Then when she got Harry, I think she did try to love him, but she feared that he would be magic, and she feared that her son would feel like she felt at his age. She saw herself in Dudley and Lily in Harry, so she did her utmost to always favor Dudley and a part of her rejection of Harry, was to show Dudley that he was the special one for her, even if he wasn't magic.
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Post by ayrine_sun on Sept 18, 2013 14:34:55 GMT -5
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Maybe that what she wanted to say, that she didn't really hate Harry, but she couldn't let her own son feel worthless and that why she acted too harshly and cruelly. But she couldn't even say it, after all those years convincing herself that the problem was Lily and her magic.
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Post by Kitty279 on Sept 29, 2013 8:21:00 GMT -5
You may have a point, but I have admittedly never seen the Evans parents neglecting Petunia over Lily that much. From the bit I remember about their childhood, I got the impression that Petunia was always rather nasty and jealous. It doesn't even have to be Lily's magical ability, or their parents doting more on her. Simply Lily being more good-looking would do it, and the fact that her younger sister had a more friendly nature and made friends easily might have been enough to make Petunia jealous. I know enough people who have self-esteem issues without being in any way neglected as kids, but drive everyone away with their behaviour.
That could be Petunia's twisted logic, yes, though I don't share it. She could have showed Dudley that she loved him as much, if not more than Harry without abusing Harry AND turning the baby whale into an obese, nasty, spoiled rotten bully because she was absolutely, totally blind to all his (and her!) faults. Even if she actually meant well for Dudley, in the end she damaged both the boys quite a bit.
Always thought she'd just want to say goodbye or at best 'good luck', but then couldn't bring herself to be at least *that* nice to Harry even once in her life.
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Post by ayrine on Sept 29, 2013 9:38:14 GMT -5
I don't believe that the Evans ever neglected Petunia. I believe though that they were parents who had two daughters, one who was "normal" and one who was "different". it's common that parents believe that the "different" child needs more attention and encouragement but that doesn't mean they neglect the other one. quiet the contrary, they love both children equally, but still think, one need more attention than the other.
It's true it could be jealousy about beauty, popularity, and other things like that, but while it could have contributed, I still believe that the core of the problem steam from her parents oblivious attitude with her, or what she considered herself as "neglect".
I would say that the 1st book confirms it, in the chapter when Hagrid reveals everything to Harry about the magic, Petunia says (not textually, but similarly, sorry)"of course I know, with my darted sister being who she was... but for my parents it was Lily This, Lily That, they were so proud to have a witch in the family, I was the only one to see her for what she was, a freak". For me it's clear that Petunia had a serious self-esteem problem due to her parents being more proud of Lily then her, or that what she thought.
Yes it is a twisted logic. It's called "somtisation" in French, not sure for the English word, it's when someone needs to blame another to evacuate their own frustration and most time, it turns out ugly. In a way it's what Snape does, he abuses Neville and Harry because he blames them for Lily's death, even if indirectly, because he knows that he is the first to blame for it. He evacuates that anger and frustration by directing it toward other people.
Back to Petunia, yes she damaged both boys because she couldn't find a good balance between reassuring her son and caring for Harry, some people are like that, always to the extreme. So she reject magic because it "ruined" her life and "killed" her sister and by doing that she couldn't accept or understand Harry and Lily.
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