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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 20:39:55 GMT -5
I'm re-doing my A Better Understanding story, because I know it's terrible. What I'd like is to have someone read through my completed chapters and give me their thoughts. I do have a beta, but I feel I need a bit more help. Would anyone be willing to offer their services?
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 20:54:01 GMT -5
What exactly are you asking that they look at? Do you want whomever to spot grammar issues, plot issues, stylistic issues or somethng else?
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 20:56:16 GMT -5
Basically grammar/spelling issues and plot issues.
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:07:24 GMT -5
So would you be willing to help? If not, I understand.
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:11:37 GMT -5
I haven't read your story before, just the prologue... What's the summary of the plot? I wrote up my one condition in another post. But I'll at least help go over the first few chapters if nothing else. But I would need to know plot summary to help in plot issues.
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:19:25 GMT -5
Well, the plot is a little convoluted, but here's my explanation of it:
Remus and Sirius, after being sucked in to the Room of Requirement, are given Sorcerer's Stone to read, along with the letter. The letter basically explains the reason they're needed to read: to save Harry from a very awful future. Sirius and Remus start reading, and come to realize that Harry has a horrid home life. Along the way, more readers are added to the primary group: Hermione, Ron, Poppy and eventually the twins. I want to rework the story to add Ginny, Luna and Neville, though.
As it turns out, the mysterious person is part of a group of people in the Afterlife. They've involved themselves in a complex ritual in order to make the readings possible, and there are moments in the chapters that deal with them as characters.
I'll go ahead and say this now: this series will paint Dumbledore in a bad light. Right now, he's just shady. But he does have plans for Harry that factor in to the future that those in the Afterlife are trying to stop.
It has a Sirius/Remus subplot, in which the two start falling for each other.
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:26:33 GMT -5
Doesn't sound all that convoluted from here. Interesting subplot, is that the main pairing for the story?
Ginny and Neville are pretty easy to get worked in too, especially after reading some of the stuff about them in the first two books... Neville isn't in a much better situation than Harry and Ginny has her own trauma thanks to what happens in book two. Luna we don't find out about till the end of book five, so she's a bit harder to get in...
Gotta have our villians. I guess both Tom and Albus will be villians in your story? Seeing as Tom will still be around... Multiple front fights!
Anything else I need to be aware of?
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:30:30 GMT -5
Well, other than my horrific examples of abuse I put in, (I was going through personal stuff when I wrote them, so they came out darker than I wanted them to) there is the fact that:
1) Voldemort is actually dead. I kind of forgot to mention that...
2) Harry is a bit angsty, and I'm not sure if I overdid it or not.
3) It gets kind of AU at points.
Sirius/Remus is the main pairing, and probably the only one I'll go in to with the series.
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:35:15 GMT -5
Hmm, I see. Well, I'll look at it. I'll need you to send the files to me... Just give me a moment to pm you my email address.
I'll let you know where to ease up and stuff. And I'll try to keep my bias for H/G out. Especially since you mentioned no other pairings at this point.
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:36:28 GMT -5
Thanks! And no, it WILL NOT be Harry/Ginny! I refuse to write that pairing! I'm thinking of Harry/George or Harry/Twins
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:38:51 GMT -5
Er... Yeah, I'm going to have trouble with that. I'll still look at your stuff, just be aware of my bias. Once the story gets to that point, I'm probably going to stop. Just fair warning.
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:48:47 GMT -5
Well, that's fine. Though the only pairing I'm doing in the A Better Understanding series is Remus/Sirius. For now, Harry and the twins have a friendly relationship. I don't want a lot of pairings to take place.
The Harry/George or Harry/Twins will occur in the non-reading sequels to it.
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:52:30 GMT -5
Right-o.
Btw, what does CR mean from your line a proud HP CR writer?
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:53:41 GMT -5
Characters Read... it's the term I use instead of Read the Books series. I seem to find that I'm the only one who actually says Characters Read though... *laughs*
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Post by Trilonias on Jun 18, 2012 21:56:16 GMT -5
Ah... I should've thought of that. Oh well.
It's just too easy for me to mistake CR for some other acronym though, since I do get involved in other things (like RPing) that have lots of acronyms for me to confuse things with...
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 18, 2012 21:57:30 GMT -5
Haha, it's fine!
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Post by rachelhitsujii on Jun 19, 2012 18:55:52 GMT -5
I would also be willing to help Kuma-chan! That is if you need it now... Just send me a PM letting me know
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Post by kumainpink on Jun 19, 2012 21:40:36 GMT -5
Thanks
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