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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 6:53:22 GMT -5
Yeah...it's awful. It doesn't happen all the time. And when it does happen, he'll usually stare into space with this horribly haunted expression. Or he'll forget where he is for a moment and think he's somewhere else. One time he shoved me because I startled him. The strangest, most innocent things can sometimes trigger a reaction. Coupled with the fact that he is recovering from cancer... yeah, it's been so hard.
The whole thing with Harry's PTSD is one of my biggest peeves, because it's a smack in the face to me. If my dad - 64 years old - can't completely get over what happened to him back there, how could a 17 year old who has been made to be a weapon this whole time? The whole thing makes me angry.
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 6:59:30 GMT -5
There are things you just can't forget, no matter how much you try, and the strangest things can trigger the memories. It may just be a smell, a noise, whatever.
And I expect your dad got at least some help - Harry never did.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:01:00 GMT -5
He did get help, and that's the part that makes me very suspicious about Harry never having it.
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:02:02 GMT -5
Harry would be a great father, I think. He would spoil them a bit, but not to much, as Dudley was. He will probably find it hard to say no, but he wants nice, healthy children, not a Dudley to son/daughter. He will put his foot down once in a while... Like he did, when James suggested that Teddy moved in his room,and James shared with Albus xD
The children seemed great and healthy, from what I read in the Epilogue.
Oh, I'm sorry about your dad, Kuma... And cancer... Cancer is a terrible ._. My brother has cancer -.-
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Post by G. Novella on Jul 21, 2012 7:02:31 GMT -5
PTSD is incredibly depressing, and I feel for you Kuma. I can't imagine having to deal with that. I want to say I hope things improve, but it's not really like that, now is it? My grandfather was in the Indian Navy, and he fought a few wars. He passed away long ago, but his injuries from the war were contributors to his early death, and my dad grew up with a father who had PTSD and couldn't really work a proper job after he retired from the Navy. And he passed when he was 70 something, never really healing. It just doesn't work that way.
I could never understand why Harry's PTSD was so miniscule. It seemed wrong, like trauma just doesn't exist, and the side-effects aren't to be shared with anyone because it just vanishes.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:03:15 GMT -5
Thanks, Chameleon... And sorry for getting personal, everyone. I just worry about him a lot. He's the only parent I have left.  |
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 7:05:19 GMT -5
He did get help, and that's the part that makes me very suspicious about Harry never having it. That makes two of us! It was never very realistic. And no need to apologise, dear, it's perfectly understandable that you worry about your dad. Besides, it makes it even more clear that the books weren't realistic about that. Oh, and Chameleon, I am so sorry about your brother! *hugs Kuma and Chameleon* |
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:07:18 GMT -5
Harry apparently has a super-recovery ability, as he apparently recovers easily from the Dursleys, the Basilisk, the Sirius Black event, Voldemort's return, Sirius' death, Dumbledore's death, and all that shit that happened in DH...
I don't believe he could have escaped the PTSD, the way he keeps going on. And he's even an Auror now!
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:10:50 GMT -5
PTSD is incredibly depressing, and I feel for you Kuma. I can't imagine having to deal with that. I want to say I hope things improve, but it's not really like that, now is it? My grandfather was in the Indian Navy, and he fought a few wars. He passed away long ago, but his injuries from the war were contributors to his early death, and my dad grew up with a father who had PTSD and couldn't really work a proper job after he retired from the Navy. And he passed when he was 70 something, never really healing. It just doesn't work that way. I could never understand why Harry's PTSD was so miniscule. It seemed wrong, like trauma just doesn't exist, and the side-effects aren't to be shared with anyone because it just vanishes. I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather... *hugs*. It must have been painful for your family to deal with. And yeah, it doesn't heal or go away. Scars like that are something that never leave consciousness - I don't believe in souls, so I'm using that term. As for those injuries...I can't relate exactly, but my father does have heart problems and diabetes because of Agent Orange. When I was old enough to understand PTSD, I didn't even believe Harry had it at first. But after I read through book 4 a second time, I started getting an inkling that he did. |
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 7:11:30 GMT -5
In my eyes, Dumbledore's way to treat him afterwards was horrible and added to the burden. You can't just give him a pat on the head, maybe a few house points, tell him some half-truths and then send him back to an abusive "home" and, as was done later, cut him off from news and tell him he doesn't need to know anything about the nutter out for his life. Realistically, Harry should have snapped long before the end of the series and either broken down or gone dark. It seems as if the fact that it was a children's series was enough to deny all the facts going hand in hand with the PTSD his experiences have given him. The epilogue once again is sugarcoating it - all is well? Really?
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Post by G. Novella on Jul 21, 2012 7:14:40 GMT -5
He definitely had PTSD, but it was so glossed that you never felt it. I kind of wanted to hit the book and make it reveal the oarts with actual PTSD.
*hugs back* I didn't know him that well, but I know the stories, and it was a pretty sad one. I hope your dad's cancer passes, he shouldn't have to deal with that. Cancer sucks.
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:15:35 GMT -5
Thanks Kitty. My brother is only sixteen, which is what annoys me most, that he can't have a normal life... You're never a teenager again. He got it only less a month after his fifteen-year old birthday, and is still in treatment, and will probably be around a year more. And then he's seventeen -.- He even lives in a another country, because he can't get treated for cancer home. All his friends ... -.-
Well, bear in the mind that it's a children series, and J.K.R. has no experience with PTSD, and apparently believes that we will all recover easily from things like Harry experienced. Her message is clear : Just move on and live happily ever after.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:19:00 GMT -5
He definitely had PTSD, but it was so glossed that you never felt it. I kind of wanted to hit the book and make it reveal the oarts with actual PTSD. *hugs back* I didn't know him that well, but I know the stories, and it was a pretty sad one. I hope your dad's cancer passes, he shouldn't have to deal with that. Cancer sucks. I know... the Cancer itself has passed so far, but he's having Chemotherapy to make sure it goes away. |
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:22:03 GMT -5
Thanks Kitty. My brother is only sixteen, which is what annoys me most, that he can't have a normal life... You're never a teenager again. He got it only less a month after his fifteen-year old birthday, and is still in treatment, and will probably be around a year more. And then he's seventeen -.- He even lives in a another country, because he can't get treated for cancer home. All his friends ... -.- Well, bear in the mind that it's a children series, and J.K.R. has no experience with PTSD, and apparently believes that we will all recover easily from things like Harry experienced. Her message is clear : Just move on and live happily ever after. *hugs* That's very sad, very sad indeed. I wish him the very best. The message may be clear, but it isn't a good one. And the implications are awful . |
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 7:22:53 GMT -5
That's even worse, Chameleon, that your brother is still so young and has to be away from home. How horrible! I really feel with your family and wish you all the best. Sadly, we can do nothing Myself I don't have experience with PTSD, either, but JKR is my age and should know it exists. But, as was said, it was a children's book, so it was just brushed under the rug. |
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:23:55 GMT -5
Yeah, that's true... *frowns*
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Post by G. Novella on Jul 21, 2012 7:26:37 GMT -5
My aunt or great-aunt (I'm not sure how I'm related to her, though I knew her well) had breast cancer, for about five years she was bed-ridden, doing chemo, surgery, everything. She couldn't even raise her own son during this time. He was I think nine when she first got the cancer. She passed away a few years ago after turning fifty. It was really sad because she was so young.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:28:42 GMT -5
Oh wow... that's just so awful. I can't imagine anything like that. |
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:29:09 GMT -5
Ahh, how sad... My brother is really down right now, because he was supposed to go for a trip to Ireland, but got fever and ended straight in the hospital... I think it's sad, that if you just get a bit fever, you're admitted on the hospital... I'm almost about to feel like a divorce child, as I visit my mother and brother, and then go home to my father.
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 7:31:10 GMT -5
Awww, that's so sad for your brother, that his holiday got cancelled because of that. And hospital just for a fever, that sounds so bad It has to be hard for you, too, as this is a strain for the whole family and makes things so difficult for you. *hugs* |
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:33:07 GMT -5
That doesn't sound like a nice feeling. I remember feeling like that at times, Chameleon. Growing up, my mother was in the hospital an awful lot. Growing up, my family was pretty dysfunctional. My dad worked nights and we hardly ever got to see him because he slept... my little sis didn't involve herself with the family for a while, and I wound up getting a lot of the duties. There was quite a bit of fighting over money and things like that... *shivers* I kept thinking they'd divorce and always feared what would happen if that were the case. |
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:37:47 GMT -5
Yeah... But only a year more... Then the doctors say he should have recovered, and my family can be normal again. I hope so. But the family will never be as before, but that I can live with.
*hugs Kitty back*
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:38:32 GMT -5
I'm glad that you'll have some semblance of normalcy, Chameleon. *joins in the hug*
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Post by G. Novella on Jul 21, 2012 7:38:49 GMT -5
Yeah, it tears a family apart, my cousin ended up an orphan at fifteen when she passed. It was alright because his grandmother took him in, and his cousin sister who's like thirty and married and super rich offered to help him fund his education, but he practically grew as a teenager without a mother.
*Hugs Chameleon* I hope he recovers. Do you mind me asking what type of cancer he has?
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:43:06 GMT -5
Aw, that sounds terrible, Kuma... Luckily it isn't that bad with us.. Or my parents just hide it, i don't know. But they seem genuinely happy together, but I think it must be hard for them to be separated this way, that there can go a couple of months before they see each other again, when they're used to see each other almost every day.
My brother has leukemia.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:46:00 GMT -5
Aww I want to huggle you all from over here... I wish you guys all the best, I really do. I'd pray, but I'm not a believer so it would be rather insincere of me to do so. And yeah, it can't be easy. But as long as they love each other, they'll pull through. Don't lose hope on that! |
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Post by G. Novella on Jul 21, 2012 7:50:28 GMT -5
*Hugs everyone*
I'm glad that it isn't tearing the family apart, Chameleon, and that he'll get better. Leukemia's awful, and though I have no personal experience, I've read a lot about different cancers. I'll send brainwaves off hope, since I'm not religious.
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Chameleon
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Post by Chameleon on Jul 21, 2012 7:50:37 GMT -5
Thanks everyone... It's always wonderful, when people support us.
Yeah... I lose hope in humanity if they don't. But well, I've never doubted that my parents will stay together forever, as they don't believe in divorce, and they love each other.
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Post by kumainpink on Jul 21, 2012 7:54:43 GMT -5
 That's a good way to think about things, Chameleon. |
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Post by Kitty279 on Jul 21, 2012 7:57:23 GMT -5
I'll keep my fingers crossed for your brother, Chameleon, and that your family can have a normal life after the treatment as well. As my mum has leukemia, too, I have an idea what that means and how hard it is.
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That's a good way to think about things, Chameleon.